waiting to have an update meeting with my department so i have a little free time. i hate when you finish a project and could start something else before your meeting - but that would cause mayhem and confusion because you'd have to stop wherever you were when it was time for the meeting and couldn't really finish your thought. so i'm avoiding that with this blog. it's update time.

i'm having a great time here lately. i've been dating. good times. some drunken times. seri is still on my mind but much less than before. he really is an asshole and you know that i could really get into it and just type away the drama, but it's really not worth it anymore. i've known he is an asshole for a long time. but now i'm not hiding my disdain. i'm tired of the bullshit and really just annoyed by the nonsense on any given day. so i've pulled back from him a lot. i just thought about it because he came up to talk a little bit ago and i just don't really have any niceties or pleasantries to exchange with him anymore.

work is fine. in some ways i'm ready to move on but mostly i'm fine. i really like what i do. i think the seri situation has just really tainted the way that i feel about being here. which isn't fair but the way it is. i can't blame it all on him but i like to pretend that i can. makes me feel better.

i haven't thrown up since Valentine's Day. so i will be purge free for two months next Tuesday. that's exciting. i've started feeling so much better about myself. the fat days are not as overwhelming as they were a year ago today. i am not incapacitated by fat thoughts or trying to find something to eat at any given time. i don't have panic attacks in the grocery store anymore. it's amazing, actually, to think of how far i've come with this and how much healthier (and skinnier) i am now that i'm not doing that. i think doing that helped accelerate and maybe even caused many of my thyroid issues. but alas, i don't know that for sure. just speculating.

bellydance is going well. one of these days i'm going to be amazing. we had evaluations saturday after class and i got a really good report. i'm happy about that because this is something that i love and would like to be good at. i've been in class since about august i think. so to hear such encouraging words even though i feel like i suck most of the time is great. hopefully i'll keep progressing.

i think that's it for the update. i hope that all is well with everyone.